Sex and love addicts anonymous book

 

    Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous (SLAA) is a twelve-step program for people recovering from SLAA publishes the book Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous. Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous and millions of other books are available for .. But the program offers a great deal of grace and healing, and the book is. Conference-approved by S.L.A.A., this book provides insight into the problem of sex and love addiction, information on working the 12 steps of S.L.A.A., the.

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    Sex And Love Addicts Anonymous Book

    Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous, or S.L.A.A., is a program for anyone who suffers This book contains information about discovering the illness, beginning . Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous THE S.L.A.A. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS BOOK. The Conference Steps, Traditions, and Concepts Committee (CSTCC) is working on a new book: “The 12 Steps and 12 Traditions of. We believe that one way of beginning your recovery may be found within the program of Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous and its literature. Our literature.

    Conference approved literature at this time. All of these items may be downloadd directly from S. Fellowship Wide Services. In maintaining my sobriety, I find it more useful to keep in mind what I call my top line rather than my bottom line. My top line is what I do want for myself, my program goals. I want to integrate myself physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually; to relate to others from a state of wholeness; to live making decisions from a place of freedom and clarity rather than compulsion and confusion; to feel sufficiently safe to stay open enough to find the little realities of life moving, rather than needing to get dropped off a cliff to get a thrill. I want to be present, see things the way they are, and be glad to be alive. These things are beginning to happen for me. Now we were truly feeling some sense of deep release from the past! We were free of much guilt for our misdeeds, from the shame of having fallen short of our inner values. We had shed or changed these to allow the seeds of our own personal wholeness to take root and grow. We were indeed living new, positive, unfolding lives. Whether in partnership with others or in solitude, we had truly been granted a spiritual release from our sex and love addiction.

    We are, however, united in a common focus: We need protect with special care the anonymity of every S.

    Hazelden Store: Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous SC

    Additionally we try to avoid drawing undue attention to S. Conference-approved July 25, top of page S. We admitted we were powerless over sex and love addiction — that our lives had become unmanageable. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood God. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

    Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

    Humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings.

    Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all. Made direct amends to such people whenever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. Continued to take personal inventory, and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

    Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to sex and love addicts, and to practice these principles in all areas of our lives. Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon S.

    For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority — a loving God as this Power may be expressed through our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern. The only requirement for S. Any two or more persons gathered together for mutual aid in recovering from sex and love addiction may call themselves an S. Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or S. Each group has but one primary purpose — to carry its message to the sex and love addict who still suffers.

    Every S. Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio, TV, film, and other public media.

    We need guard with special care the anonymity of all fellow S. Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities. World Services, Inc. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol — that our lives had become unmanageable. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

    Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

    Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs. Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon A.

    For our group purpose, there is but one ultimate authority—a loving God as he may express Himself in our group conscience. The only requirement for A. Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups of A. Each group has but one primary purpose--to carry its message to the alcoholic who still suffers.

    Every A. Alcoholics Anonymous should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers. Alcoholics Anonymous has no opinion on outside issues; hence the A. Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio and films.

    Fearing abandonment and loneliness, we stay in and return to painful, destructive relationships, concealing our dependency needs from ourselves and others, growing more isolated and alienated from friends and loved ones, ourselves, and God. We feel empty and incomplete when we are alone. Even though we fear intimacy and commitment, we continually search for relationships and sexual contacts.

    We sexualize stress, guilt, loneliness, anger, shame, fear and envy. We use sex or emotional dependence as substitutes for nurturing, care, and support. We use sex and emotional involvement to manipulate and control others. We become immobilized or seriously distracted by romantic or sexual obsessions or fantasies.

    We avoid responsibility for ourselves by attaching ourselves to people who are emotionally unavailable. We stay enslaved to emotional dependency, romantic intrigue, or compulsive sexual activities. To avoid feeling vulnerable, we may retreat from all intimate involvement, mistaking sexual and emotional anorexia for recovery. We assign magical qualities to others. We idealize and pursue them, then blame them for not fulfilling our fantasies and expectations.

    All Rights Reserved We seek to develop a daily relationship with a Higher Power, knowing that we are not alone in our efforts to heal ourselves from our addiction. We are willing to be vulnerable because the capacity to trust has been restored to us by our faith in a Higher Power. We surrender, one day at a time, our whole life strategy of, and our obsession with, the pursuit of romantic and sexual intrigue and emotional dependency.

    We learn to avoid situations that may put us at risk physically, morally, psychologically or spiritually. We learn to accept and love ourselves, to take responsibility for our own lives, and to take care of our own needs before involving ourselves with others. We become willing to ask for help, allowing ourselves to be vulnerable and learning to trust and accept others.

    We allow ourselves to work through the pain of our low self-esteem and our fears of abandonment and responsibility. We learn to feel comfortable in solitude. We begin to accept our imperfections and mistakes as part of being human, healing our shame and perfectionism while working on our character defects. We begin to substitute honest for self-destructive ways of expressing emotions and feelings. We become honest in expressing who we are, developing true intimacy in our relationships with ourselves and others.

    We learn to value sex as a by-product of sharing, commitment, trust and cooperation in a partnership. We are restored to sanity, on a daily basis, by participating in the process of recovery.

    I will help you to grow, to become more productive, by your definition. I will help you become more autonomous, more loving of yourself, more excited, less sensitive, more free to continue becoming the authority for your own living. I cannot give you growth, or grow for you. You must grow yourself, by facing reality, grim as it may be at times. I cannot take away your loneliness or pain.

    I cannot sense your world for you, evaluate your goals for you, or tell you what is best for you in your world, for you have your own world.

    I cannot convince you of the crucial choice of choosing the scary uncertainty of growing, over the safe misery of not growing. When I begin to care for you out of pity, when I begin to lose trust in you, then I am toxic and bad, inhibiting for you, and you for me. If you can accept all of this, then perhaps we can help each other to become what HP meant us to be — mature adults — leaving childishness forever to the little children.

    If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace.

    No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change.

    Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us.

    We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves. Are these extravagant promises?

    We think not. They are being fulfilled among us — Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize If we work for them. These are the promises we in SLAA have found: We will regain control of our lives. We will begin to feel dignity and respect for ourselves. The loneliness will subside and we will begin to enjoy being alone. We will no longer be plagued by an unceasing sense of longing.

    In the company of family and friends, we will be with them in body and mind. We will pursue interests and activities that we desire for ourselves. Love will be a committed, thoughtful decision rather than a feeling by which we are overwhelmed.

    We will love and accept ourselves. We will relate to others from a state of wholeness. We will extend ourselves for the purpose of nurturing our own or another's spiritual growth.

    We will make peace with our past and make amends to those we have hurt. We will be thankful for what has been given us, what has been taken away, and what has been left behind. Originally by Ann C. Faith instead of despair. Courage instead of fear. Peace of mind instead of confusion. Self respect instead of self contempt. Self confidence instead of helplessness. The respect of others instead of pity and contempt. A clean conscience instead of a sense of guilt.

    Real friendship instead of loneliness. A clean pattern of life instead of a purposeless existence. The love and understanding of our families instead of their doubts and fears. The Freedom of a happy life instead of the bondage of sex and love addiction or anorexia. Living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time, accepting hardship as a pathway to peace; taking, as God did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; trusting that You will make all things right if I surrender to Your will; so that I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with You forever in the next.

    At Step Three, many of us said to our Maker, as we understood Him: God, I offer myself to Thee, to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will.

    May I do Thy will always! We thought well before taking this Step, making sure we were ready. Then we could commence to abandon ourselves utterly to Him.

    This passage immediately follows after the steps 1 through 5 have been explained Carefully reading the first five proposals we ask if we have omitted anything, for we are building an arch through which we shall walk a free man at last. Is our work solid so far? Are the stones properly in place? Have we skimped on the cement put into the foundation? Have we tried to make mortar without sand?

    If we can answer to our satisfaction, we then look at Step Six. We have emphasized willingness as being indispensable.

    Are we now ready to let God remove from us all the things which we have admitted are objectionable? Can He now take them all - every one? If we still cling to something we will not let go, we ask God to help us be willing. When ready, we say something like this: My Creator, I am willing that You should have all of me, good and bad. I pray that You now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to You and my fellows.

    Grant me strength as I go out from here to do your bidding. We have then completed Step Seven. Lord, make me a channel of Thy peace — that where there is hatred, I may bring love — that where there is wrong, I may bring the spirit of forgiveness — that where there is discord, I may bring harmony — that where there is error, I may bring truth — that where there is doubt, I may bring faith — that where there is despair, I may bring hope — that where there are shadows, I may bring light — that where there is sadness, I may bring joy.

    God, grant that I may seek rather to comfort, than to be comforted — to understand, than to be understood — to love, than to be loved. For it is by self-forgetting that one finds. It is by forgiving that one is forgiven. It is by dying that one awakens to Eternal Life.

    Amen Prayer of St. Francis another version this version not conference approved Lord, make me an instrument of your peace. Where there is hatred, let me sow love. Additionally we try to avoid drawing undue attention to S. Conference-approved July 25, S. We admitted we were powerless over sex and love addiction — that our lives had become unmanageable.

    Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood God. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character. Humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

    Made direct amends to such people whenever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. Continued to take personal inventory, and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to sex and love addicts, and to practice these principles in all areas of our lives.

    Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon S. For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority — a loving God as this Power may be expressed through our group conscience.

    You are not alone

    Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern. The only requirement for S. Any two or more persons gathered together for mutual aid in recovering from sex and love addiction may call themselves an S. Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or S. Each group has but one primary purpose — to carry its message to the sex and love addict who still suffers.

    Every S. Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio, TV, film, and other public media. We need guard with special care the anonymity of all fellow S. Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities. World Services, Inc. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol — that our lives had become unmanageable.

    Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

    Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

    Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon A. For our group purpose, there is but one ultimate authority—a loving God as he may express Himself in our group conscience.

    The only requirement for A. Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups of A. Each group has but one primary purpose--to carry its message to the alcoholic who still suffers.

    Every A. Alcoholics Anonymous should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers. Alcoholics Anonymous has no opinion on outside issues; hence the A. Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio and films. Fearing abandonment and loneliness, we stay in and return to painful, destructive relationships, concealing our dependency needs from ourselves and others, growing more isolated and alienated from friends and loved ones, ourselves, and God.

    We feel empty and incomplete when we are alone. Even though we fear intimacy and commitment, we continually search for relationships and sexual contacts. We sexualize stress, guilt, loneliness, anger, shame, fear and envy.

    We use sex or emotional dependence as substitutes for nurturing, care, and support. We use sex and emotional involvement to manipulate and control others. We become immobilized or seriously distracted by romantic or sexual obsessions or fantasies.

    We avoid responsibility for ourselves by attaching ourselves to people who are emotionally unavailable. We stay enslaved to emotional dependency, romantic intrigue, or compulsive sexual activities. To avoid feeling vulnerable, we may retreat from all intimate involvement, mistaking sexual and emotional anorexia for recovery. We assign magical qualities to others. We idealize and pursue them, then blame them for not fulfilling our fantasies and expectations.

    All Rights Reserved We seek to develop a daily relationship with a Higher Power, knowing that we are not alone in our efforts to heal ourselves from our addiction. We are willing to be vulnerable because the capacity to trust has been restored to us by our faith in a Higher Power.

    You are not alone.

    We surrender, one day at a time, our whole life strategy of, and our obsession with, the pursuit of romantic and sexual intrigue and emotional dependency. We learn to avoid situations that may put us at risk physically, morally, psychologically or spiritually. We learn to accept and love ourselves, to take responsibility for our own lives, and to take care of our own needs before involving ourselves with others. We become willing to ask for help, allowing ourselves to be vulnerable and learning to trust and accept others.

    We allow ourselves to work through the pain of our low self-esteem and our fears of abandonment and responsibility. We learn to feel comfortable in solitude. We begin to accept our imperfections and mistakes as part of being human, healing our shame and perfectionism while working on our character defects. We begin to substitute honest for self-destructive ways of expressing emotions and feelings. We become honest in expressing who we are, developing true intimacy in our relationships with ourselves and others.

    We learn to value sex as a by-product of sharing, commitment, trust and cooperation in a partnership. We are restored to sanity, on a daily basis, by participating in the process of recovery. In maintaining my sobriety, I find it more useful to keep in mind what I call my top line rather than my bottom line.

    My top line is what I do want for myself, my program goals. I want to integrate myself physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually; to relate to others from a state of wholeness; to live making decisions from a place of freedom and clarity rather than compulsion and confusion; to feel sufficiently safe to stay open enough to find the little realities of life moving, rather than needing to get dropped off a cliff to get a thrill.

    I want to be present, see things the way they are, and be glad to be alive. These things are beginning to happen for me. I will help you to grow, to become more productive, by your definition.

    I will help you become more autonomous, more loving of yourself, more excited, less sensitive, more free to continue becoming the authority for your own living. I cannot give you growth, or grow for you.

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